12/17/2017

Mar. 27, 2006: Liberal Readers Say My Column Has Gone To The Dogs

A few weeks ago I wondered aloud what liberals think about a number of issues — and why — and asked them to let me know. A lot of them did, although I got more mail pooh-poohing liberal-think, which makes me wonder if liberals may be a vanishing species — kind of like the snail […]

Mar. 20, 2006: UGA and Yale Share a Common History, But Not Much Else

You may not know this, but the University of Georgia, the oldest state-chartered university in the nation, located in Athens, the Classic City of the South, enjoys a common bond with Yale University. Abraham Baldwin, a Yale graduate, helped establish Franklin College (today’s University of Georgia), and served as the institution’s first president. The North […]

Mar. 13, 2006: BellSouth Has Gone and Taken My Loyalty With It

Well, knock me over with a rotary-dial telephone! My alma mater, BellSouth, has been purchased by “The New AT&T,” aka SBC, aka Southwestern Bell, one of the seven original Regional Holding Companies, created at the divestiture of “The Old AT&T” back in 1984. Plans are to move the headquarters of the company to San Antonio, […]

Mar. 6, 2006: Trying To Understand My Liberal Friends

Okay, I am going to give most of you the day off. The rest of you need to pay close attention. You have some work to do. A lot of you I know like a book. That comes from almost a decade of responding to your letters and emails on a variety of subjects. You’ve […]

Feb. 27, 2006: Advice to Legislators: Don’t Insult Our Intelligence

I had planned to write a column this week on the bizarre decision by the Bush administration to turn over management of six of our major ports to the wonderful folks at the United Arab Emirates. You remember the UAE, don’t you? This country was one of only three to recognize the Taliban as the […]

Feb. 20, 2006: It Is The Media That Can’t Seem to Shoot Straight

Have you ever seen anything to match the White House press corps’ dither over the recent hunting accident involving Vice President Dick Cheney? Cheney accidentally put some birdshot in a lawyer buddy instead of a defenseless quail, and the media didn’t find out about it until the next day. To observe their reaction, you would […]

Feb. 13, 2006: Nothing Jimmy Carter Says Will Change The Facts

Jimmy Carter was arguably one of the least effective presidents of the 20th century. Historians say Warren Harding was nothing to write home about, but he couldn’t have been as mean-spirited and petty as President Peanut has turned out to be. I found Carter’s conduct at Coretta Scott King’s funeral reprehensible and hypocritical to the […]

Feb. 6, 2006: A “Thank You” To Readers From Georgia General Rodeheaver

Here is a message especially for you from Brig. Gen. Stewart Rodeheaver, commanding general of Georgia’s 48th Brigade Combat Team in Iraq: “Hello from Baghdad, Iraq. Dick Yarbrough was kind enough to ask you to write the soldiers of the 48th Brigade. You responded with true Southern style and caring. We received hundreds of cards, […]

Jan. 30, 2006: Freshman Republican Gives Behind-The-Scenes Look at Congress

Why would anybody want to run for Congress? Most Americans view the institution with about as much regard as they do mule skinners and telephone marketers. You spend every waking hour raising money, making nice to cranky voters, running from meeting to meeting, getting your arm twisted by more special-interest groups than you can count […]

Jan. 23, 2006: Georgia Encyclopedia Reveals A Lot About Our Great State

As I’ve said before, one of the finest resources available to learn about the Great State of Georgia is the New Georgia Encyclopedia, a project of the Georgia Humanities Council, the Office of the Governor, the University of Georgia Press and the University System of Georgia. You can find all kinds of information at www.georgiaencyclopedia.org. […]

Jan. 16, 2006: Random Thoughts on (Mostly Political) Random Subjects

If nobody else is going to mention it, then I will: How can Ted Kennedy lecture Supreme Court nominee Samuel Alito about issues of morality? Kennedy got his jumbo-sized boxer shorts in a wad over the fact that Alito once belonged to a club at Princeton University that lobbied to keep the school all-male. This […]

Jan. 8, 2006: Georgians Have Lost Their Best Friend in State Government

Teddy Lee just got fired as executive secretary of the State Ethics Commission. It is your loss — and a big one. He was sacked by a bunch of politicians who couldn’t bend him, fold him or intimidate him from representing your interests above theirs. It is not an overstatement to say that many in […]

Jan. 1, 2006: Annual Letter To My Grandsons

To My Grandsons: Cool Isn’t Cool. God, Country And Family Are To Zachary and Nicholas Wansley, Brian and Thomas Yarbrough: It has become tradition to write you guys at the first of the year and lay a little unsolicited advice on you. I’ve never asked what, if anything, you do with these pearls of wisdom. […]

Dec. 26, 2005: Dang Near Perfect Person Has New Year’s Resolution for Others

I will soon be leaving for my annual pilgrimage to the exquisite little Georgia Sea Grill on St. Simons Island, in order to participate in the sacred New Year’s ritual of stuffing my face full of all the corn-fried shrimp that exists on the face of the earth. I know — it’s a dirty job, […]

Dec. 19, 2005: An Ode of Appreciation To Our Public School Teachers

This is as good a time of year as any to thank public school teachers for doing a tough job well. There are two high school science teachers in my family. Both are at work early, and both stay late. When at home, they are calling parents about their kids’ schoolwork, or fielding calls from […]

Dec. 12, 2005: Santa, No Need To Stop Here — I Have Everything I Need

Dear Santa: Before you head out from the North Pole this year, I wanted you to know that there is no need to stop by my house this Christmas. Please don’t take this the wrong way, Santa, but there is nothing you have that I need. My cup runneth over. It has taken me a […]

Dec. 5, 2005: Readers Respond Quickly To Request To Write The Troops in Iraq

Whoa! Ask and you will receive. A few weeks ago, I suggested you might want to write the men and women of Georgia’s 48th Brigade Combat Team in Iraq during the holiday season and thank them for their sacrifices. Your response has been overwhelming. The troops are going to get a lot of mail because […]

Nov. 28, 2005: There’s Nothing Wrong With Talking Southern

I promised the Woman Who Shares My Name I was going to be a good boy-person this holiday season. No picking on liberal weenies and getting them all upset. Besides, liberal weenies can’t help it if they were born without a sense of humor. It is a genetic defect and picking on them is like […]

Nov. 21, 2005: Holiday Letters To The Troops: The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Need a Christmas gift idea? I have a suggestion. Write the citizen-soldiers of Georgia’s 48th Brigade Combat Team. Tell them you are thinking about them at this special season, and thank them for the sacrifices they are making on our behalf. I can think of no better gift you could give than that. When I […]

Nov. 14, 2005: What Part of ‘Illegal’ Do Georgia Businesses Not Understand?

Sen. Chip Rogers (R-Woodstock) is taking a lot of crap for doing the right thing. In this case, the right thing is Senate Bill 170, which declares that anyone not legally in the United States is also not a legal resident of Georgia. Well, duh! Rogers says his measure simply supports existing laws that already […]

Nov. 7, 2005: To My Grandson Nicholas: You Are a True Champion

Dear Nicholas: You gave your grandfather one of his proudest moments last week. Watching you run your last high school cross-country race in the state championships at Carrollton was special. You didn’t win the race and you didn’t finish in the top ten. You did something better. You gave it everything you had. You told […]

Oct. 31, 2005: McKinney’s Fund-Raising Tactics Out of This World

Here is some political news guaranteed to sour your milk. Cynthia McKinney, our ambassador to Outer Space and congressperson from Georgia’s 4th Congressional District, has been fined $33,000 by the Federal Election Commission and must reimburse as much as $72,000 more to political donors after accepting excessive contributions in the 2002 election, which she lost […]

Oct. 14, 2005: Iraq Column #7

MIXED EMOTIONS: LEAVING THE 48TH BRIGADE COMBAT TEAM I am coming home. As you read this, I should be on a C-5A headed for Dover, Del. and then to Home Sweet Home. I leave with mixed emotions. Taking the world’s longest shower and sleeping in a real bed with a real mattress will be a […]

Oct. 13, 2005: Iraq Column #6

COLUMNIST SEES THE WAR ‘UP CLOSE AND PERSONAL’ With Georgia’s 648th engineering battalion in the Triangle of Death. I saw the war in Iraq up close and personal today. In fact, it was up closer than I wanted. A couple of bad guys exploded an IED (an improvised explosive device) as we were crossing a […]

Oct. 12, 2005: Iraq Column #5

GEORGIANS HELPING TO BUILD SCHOOLS AND TRUST With the 118th Field Artillery Battalion in Taji. Today we went by helicopter to Camp Taji, south of Baghdad and the headquarters of the First Battalion of the 118 Field Artillery Regiment. This regiment, composed mainly of Georgians, has a myriad of responsibilities including overseeing various construction projects […]

Oct. 11, 2005: Iraq Column #4

FIGHTING TERRORISM WITH AMERICAN GOODNESS With Georgia’s 48th Combat Brigade Team at Radwaniya near Camp Stryker. General Stewart Rodeheaver, commanding general of Georgia’s 48th, invited us to ride along with him today to dedicate a local health clinic. Why would a general who has a lot of war on his hands these days take the […]

Oct. 10, 2005: Iraq Column #3

DRIVING THE DANGEROUS ROADS OF IRAQ WITH A BAND OF BROTHERS With Georgia’s 48th Brigade Combat Team in Mahmoudiyah and the Lion’s Den. This morning General Stewart Rodeheaver, commanding general of the 48th, had a meeting scheduled with General Mahdi, brigade commander of the Iraqi army, to discuss last minute preparations for Saturday’s vote on […]

Oct. 9, 2005: Iraq Column #2

With Georgia’s 48th Brigade Combat Team at Camp Striker on the Outskirts of Baghdad Just when I had decided that the United States military couldn’t organize a two-tank parade and that I would spend the rest of my unnatural life in that Garden Spot of the World — the passenger lounge at Ramstein Air Force […]

Oct. 8, 2005: Iraq Column #1

Dear Folks: It has been the Week from Hell, but (famous last words) it may be over shortly. It is now midafternoon Saturday at Ramstein Air Force Base in Germany. After our aborted flight to Baghdad, there have been no planes to take troops or people like me to anywhere. That is about to change. […]

Oct. 7, 2005: Iraq — So Near and So Far Away

This isn’t the column I wanted to write. I am supposed to be in Iraq, embedded with Georgia’s 48th Brigade Combat Team, but I am sitting in an Air Force Base in Ramstein, Germany, watching one of the biggest fiascoes imaginable. I’m not sure how many days I have been here; and that isn’t important. […]

Sep. 19, 2005: Delta Retirees Pay Big Price For Company’s Bankruptcy

In a former life, I was entrusted with the responsibility of dealing with the public on behalf of my company, Southern Bell and later BellSouth. Getting the trust and confidence of my management was a long and arduous task. There were many stressful days, a lot of weekends in the office and bulging briefcases in […]

Sep. 12, 2005: September 11 Reflections: Watching Good People Do Good Things

I spent Sept. 11 where I should have. I was in church — specifically, Wesley Memorial Methodist Church on St. Simons Island. I had to be there. I was at St. Simons on Sept. 11, 2001, when the terrorist attacks occurred. The Glynn County United Way had invited me to address their annual campaign kickoff. […]

Sep. 5, 2005: Hurricane Katrina Has Brought The Worst of Time, The Best of Times

To quote Charles Dickens: “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.” He could have been talking about us. We have certainly been through the worst of times. If there is anything worse than the devastation caused by Hurricane Katrina, I’ll pass, thank you. Here we are at the fourth anniversary […]

Aug. 22, 2005: We Have the Good Life; Hondurans Have the Good Attitude

My mission trip to Honduras was beyond anything I could have imagined. I highly recommend it if for nothing else than to give you some perspective on how good you have it. We have been abundantly blessed and still can find enough wrong with our country and ourselves to whine like spoiled brats. The Hondurans […]

Aug. 21, 2006: Grandsons at Tech and UGA Make For Some Hard Choices

I’ve been a grandfather for more than 19 years, and until now it has been a slam-dunk. Grandparenting is great revenge for those fortunate enough to have survived raising their own kids. Now you get to listen to your children complain about how temperamental their kids are, conveniently forgetting that they were a king-sized horse’s […]

Aug. 15, 2005: What Am I Doing In Honduras? Blame It On Dr. Gil

As you read these words, I am in Honduras, a place I couldn’t have found on the map a month ago and would never in my wildest dreams thought of visiting. I am not sure what I will be doing here, but I am told I can expect anything from construction work to entertaining a […]

Aug. 8, 2005: Even With Water, Georgia is Still the Greatest State

Recently, I gave you 10 reasons that it is great to be a Georgian. It turns out that a couple of the reasons may have to be restated in the interest of total accuracy. Otherwise, I could lose my certification as a politically correct, non-controversial, modest and much-beloved columnist. An émigré from “middle America” who […]

Aug. 1, 2005: No Need to Check the Calendar — Dog Days Are Here

There is no need to check the calendar. These are definitely the Dog Days of summer. Webster’s Dictionary defines Dog Days as, “The period between early July and early September when the hot sultry weather of summer usually occurs in the northern hemisphere; a period of stagnation.” The C. Richard Yarbrough Book of Bromides, Beatitudes […]

Jul. 25, 2005: An Analysis of Today’s Issues With the Help of My New Computer

AN ANALYSIS OF TODAY’S ISSUES WITH THE HELP OF MY NEW COMPUTER What you are reading today is courtesy of a new wireless laptop computer equipped with everything but a flush toilet. It has more rams than a Scottish sheepherder, and so many bells and whistles that the computer salesman nearly slobbered himself to death […]

Jul. 18, 2005: Ten Reasons That It Is Great To Be a Georgian

It never fails. Let me twit some foreign land like the Middle East or Vermont with my keen and well-developed sense of humor, and the natives react with righteous indignation. A reader in Illinois took exception to a recent column about Wrigley’s chewing gum factory moving some folks to a “Southern backwater town” (his term, […]

Jul. 11, 2005: Getting the “Bear” Facts From The Source

A few weeks ago, I discussed slides of my vacation. In passing, I happened to mention the Bear from Big Canoe. The column got a lot of mail, but no one was the least bit interested in my vacation. Everybody wanted to know more about the bear. Go figure. To accommodate my readers, I recently […]

Jul. 4, 2005: Here’s Something to Chew On: Wrigley is Moving to Georgia

Score another one for the State of Georgia. The Wrigley chewing gum folks have announced they are closing one of their plants in Chicago – as soon as the snow melts enough so that they can find it – and transferring many of the jobs to Gainesville. Employees were asked not to giggle and high-five […]

Jun. 27, 2005: Psst! Some Inside Info From My Confidential Source

Now that the old geezer with the glazed eyes and stupid grin tottering around behind his walker has told us he is the infamous Deep Throat who helped bring down the Nixon White House, I have a confession to make. I, too, have a confidential source who shares a lot of important stuff with me […]

Jun. 20, 2005: The Bear Facts About How I Spent My Vacation

For the first time in all the years that I have been dazzling you with my fancy words and intricate phrasing, I took a week of much-needed vacation. Knowing that you would be interested in what I did during my time off, I have brought along some slides. Would somebody dim the lights? CLICK: This […]

Jun. 6, 2005: Would I Encourage My Grandsons To Go To War?

Willis Forrester is a regular reader of this space and a frequent critic. He, like many others, does not approve of the Iraqi war. I, on the other hand, would nuke anybody in the Middle East who even looked cross-eyed at us, until somebody apologized for what happened on 9/11 and promised to help us […]

May 30, 2005: New and Improved Commandments on the Way

Much has been made of whether or not to allow the Ten Commandments to be posted in government buildings, but not much has been said about whether or not the Commandments as written are appropriate in today’s fast-paced world. After all, the original Commandments were written thousands of years ago for a bunch of people […]

May 23, 2005: Random Thoughts on Random Subjects

The traffic-choked, sewer-impaired, panhandling paradise affectionately known as the City of Atlanta has embarked on an effort to come up with a new image. Brand Atlanta, composed of local tourism and convention officials, has hired advertising ace Joel Babbit, chief creative officer of Grey Worldwide Advertising, to help develop this image, which is estimated to […]

May 16, 2005: Some Advice For My Grandson on His Graduation Day

Dear Zack: It is hard to believe that you are graduating from high school. It seems only yesterday I was calling your mom to be sure you made it through the first day of school without getting lost or having your lunch money stolen. You are the first of the grandchildren to graduate from high […]

May 9, 2005: An Apology From the Runaway Columnist

Good morning, ladies and gentlemen of the media. My name is J. Barnyard Blatherington, and I am the attorney, spiritual counselor and part-time ukulele instructor for Dick Yarbrough, the modest and much-beloved newspaper columnist who recently ran away for no apparent reason before suddenly showing up again on the arms of a knockout police babe. […]

May 2, 2005: You Can Have Your MTV… Give Me Old-Time Gospel Music

It is gratifying to know I share something in common with one of Georgia’s preeminent authors, Terry Kay. Unfortunately, it is not the use of the English language. While Kay and I have access to the same nouns and verbs, he strings his together into award-winning novels. Me? I am still trying to figure out […]

Apr. 25, 2005: If You Ain’t Southern, You Can’t Fake It

Admittedly, this doesn’t rise to the level of many of the burning issues that confront us daily, but I must tell you that it fries my hide to hear outsiders trying to talk Southern. Friends, if you ain’t Southern, you can’t fake it. I was reminded of that unalterable fact the other night while watching […]

Apr. 18, 2005: Good Journalism Is Not a Joke

UGA journalism professor Conrad Fink has more to worry about these days than whether or not I am going to invite him over for milk and cookies. If Anna Ferguson’s column didn’t scare the hell out of him, he needs to find another line of work. Miss Ferguson is a senior journalism major at the […]

Apr. 11, 2005: Remembering The Olympic Park Bombing

Eric Rudolph has confessed to being the Olympic Park bomber, as well as to bombing a gay nightclub in Atlanta and an abortion clinic in Birmingham. For this he will receive four life sentences with no chance for parole and will spend the rest of his sorry life in a federal prison, courtesy of the […]

Apr. 4, 2005: It’s No Secret: Republicans Dominated Recent Legislative Session

Psst! It’s okay. You can come out now. The Legislature has adjourned. As you have read ad nauseum, this was the first legislative session since Hector was a pup that had a Republican governor and Republicans in a majority in both houses. As we quickly found out, however, changing majorities doesn’t change behavior. Republicans found […]

Mar. 28, 2005: New Trend in Georgia Politics is Music To My Ears

You may have read about H.B. 244. This Republican-backed bill would require registered voters to show some sort of photo identification before they step into the voting booth. The proposal enraged black legislators. I am with them on this issue. If I had to show poll workers my driver’s license picture, they would fall down […]

Mar. 21, 2005: Congress Examines Potential Steroid Use by Much-Beloved Columnists

Rap! Rap! Rap! This session of the Congressional Oversight Committee on Burning Issues and Other Stuff is now in session. I want to remind my colleagues that our hearings are being televised. Therefore, it is critical that we posture a lot and wave our hands and not fall asleep so voters back home will think […]

Mar. 14, 2005: Media Arrogance: Up Close And Personal

In his book “Why America Hates the Press,” author Jim Fallows describes a press panel at Montclair State College in the late ‘80s. CBS correspondent Mike Wallace was asked, if he were embedded with enemy soldiers and came upon a small group of American soldiers about to be ambushed, would he try to warn the […]

Mar. 7, 2005: Make Government More Open and Less Secretive

Rep. Ron Stephens, the author of an ill-conceived piece of legislation known as H.R. 218, was recently identified in this space as being from Garden City, near Savannah. Not so, say residents of that city. Even though most of the state’s media refer to him as representing Garden City, it seems Rep. Stephens has pulled […]

Feb. 28, 2005: Exclusive: A Look At Upcoming Specialty Auto Tags

The Legislature has announced plans to create a new automobile tag to benefit arts groups. If passed into law, the tags would be available in 2006 for $25. Proceeds would go to arts programs in the counties where the tags are purchased. The arts tag would join a list of other specialty tags in Georgia […]

Feb. 21, 2005: Readers Have Strong Opinions on Leeburn Reappointment to Board of Regents

Sometimes, this column just writes itself. Or, more accurately, readers write it for me. That is the advantage of having smart, articulate and passionate readers with strong opinions. Eat your heart out, Molly Ivins. Folks all over the state have their dander up over Gov. Sonny Perdue’s reappointment of Columbus liquor baron Don Leebern to […]

Feb. 14, 2005: Random Thoughts on Random Subjects

Attention all die-hard Tech fans. My beloved grandson Zachary Earl Wansley has announced he will be attending Georgia Tech this fall. You heard correctly. G-E-O-R-G-I-A-T-E-C-H. His mother and father and both grandfathers are graduates of the University of Georgia, and Zack is going to Tech. Don’t tell me God doesn’t have a sense of humor. […]

Feb. 7, 2005: Leeburn Reappointment is a Big Disappointment

So much for the New Georgia that Gov. Sonny Perdue promised us. Right now, New Georgia looks a lot like the old one. The governor has reappointed Don Leeburn, the controversial Columbus liquor dealer, to another seven-year term on the Board of Regents, proving that money talks as loudly to Republicans as it does to […]

Jan. 31, 2005: Senate Bill 5 Is a Stinker

Alpharetta Republican State Senator Dan Moody is either smarter than the average bear, or he has a serious political death wish. Since I come in contact with a lot of bears around Big Canoe and have developed a keen sense of their IQ, I must assume the latter — that Moody is looking to get […]

Jan. 25, 2005: You Have Questions? I Have All The Answers

One of the most rewarding parts of this job is the opportunity to answer questions from readers. It is a responsibility I take very seriously. Perhaps something I say could advance the cause of world peace, or maybe even turn John Kerry’s frown upside down. You just never know. Now to the mailbox to see […]

Jan. 17, 2005: Wealth Is Measured By Friendships, Not Bank Accounts

When you have witnessed as many sunrises and sunsets as I have, you learn some inevitable truths. You discover, for example, that you measure your wealth not by bank accounts and accumulated toys, but by meaningful friendships, and that the best friends are the ones willing to accept you the way you are — warts […]

Jan. 10, 2005: Life On Mars Means Big Changes On Earth

We interrupt this column to bring you an important announcement. Scientists recently announced that there might be life on Mars. “Surface conditions at Meridiani Planum may have been habitable for some period of time in Martian history,” says Cornell University astronomer Steven Squyres, who heads a team of scientists examining data from a NASA rover […]

Jan. 3, 2005: To My Grandsons: Life Is Too Short To Waste

To Brian and Thomas Yarbrough, Zachary and Nicholas Wansley: Don’t look now, guys, but we are halfway through the first decade of the 21st century. That may not seem like a big deal to four active teenagers with the best years of their lives ahead of them, but from one who first saw the light […]

Dec. 27, 2004: I Can See That It’s Going To Be An Interesting Year

I don’t know about you, but I am ready for 2004 to slip-slide right on out the door. Any year in which Ray Charles and Ronald Reagan die, but Osama bin Laden doesn’t, has outlived its usefulness as far as I am concerned. It is time to move on. As grumpy as 2004 was, is […]

Dec. 20, 2004: Zell’s TV Gig May Take A Little Interpretation

As you may have heard, Zell Miller has signed on as a Fox News Network commentator. After approving the agreement, Fox executives realized that there are still a few people — mostly in Vermont and Southern California — who don’t speak Southern. Suffice it to say that they wouldn’t have the foggiest idea what our […]

Dec. 13, 2004: How To Write A Column Without Exhaling

The Woman Who Shares My Name told me she does not want to see one of my usual bomb-throwing columns this week. “It is the Christmas season. I don’t want you criticizing anybody or anything,” she ordered. Having been blessed with exceptional negotiating skills, I immediately went for the middle ground. “Good suggestion,” I said, […]

Dec. 6, 2004: To Public Education Supporters: Stand Up or Shut Up

Anyone who has casually perused this space knows I am a strong advocate of public education. I am a product of public schools. I have a son and a son-in-law who teach high school science in public schools and four beloved grandsons who attend public schools. All by choice. Both teachers could make a lot […]

Nov. 29, 2004: A Letter To Santa Clause From a Very Good Boy

Dear Santa: I wanted to get my letter to you early because it is a known fact that you deal with all the good little boys and girls first and, as usual, I have been gooder than gold. Therefore, I appreciate your putting my requests at the front of the line. Should you hear anything […]

Nov. 22, 2004: A Visit to the USO Shows the Very Best of America

I have seen the very best of America, and it is not Martin Sheen or Michael Moore. Rather, it is the salesman from Akron, Ohio, with a three-year-old daughter he has held too seldom since her birth. It is the grocery clerk from Fredericksburg, Maryland. It is the student studying heating and air conditioning in […]

Nov. 15, 2004: An Exclusive Look Inside a Democratic Party Strategy Session

I appreciate everyone coming today as we try to figure out how the Democratic Party blew the presidential election and to see what we can do to turn things around. Clearly, the American public doesn’t have a clue what they have done. They are a bunch of ignorant morons who don’t know what is best […]

Nov. 8, 2004: Some Unvarnished Truths About the Recent Elections

Here is a prediction you can take to the bank: For the next four years, the national news media is going to obsess on America’s “cultural divide.” In their opinion, that is why George W. Bush won re-election and why Democrats are out of power. In my opinion, they don’t know what they are talking […]

Nov. 1, 2004: Random Thoughts on Random Subjects

HEAR FROM THE REST, THEN HEAR FROM THE BEST. Yes, I am going to comment on the elections – next week. Let all the political pundits make their educated guesses as to what happened and why, then yours truly will swoop in and give you the unvarnished and unalterable facts. I receive no extra remuneration […]

Oct. 25, 2004: An In-Depth Analysis of the 2004 Presidential Election

Being a political genius is no walk in the park. Most of you have free time to organize your sock drawer or to watch Dan Rather make an ass of himself, but not me. I am constantly besieged for my insights on the political scene, particularly the upcoming presidential election. Granted, this is a critical […]

Oct. 18, 2004: Announcing the Fourth Annual Pfft! Awards!

Welcome, ladies and gentlemen to the fourth annual Pfft! Awards! For those of you who may be newcomers to this space, the Pffts! were created in 2001 by your intrepid correspondent to honor those individuals and organizations who by word and deed have earned a well-placed Pfft! This is one award ceremony in which the […]

Oct. 11, 2004: Boortz Says Government Schools Are Pitiful. I Say That’s Debatable.

After watching the vacuous babble that passes for presidential debates, I am ready for a head-knocking, rip-snorting debate between two articulate participants with widely divergent views. How about Neal Boortz and Zachary Wansley? Boortz is the popular nationally syndicated radio “Talkmaster.” I have known him since he was a talk radio rookie in Atlanta, and […]

Oct. 4, 2004: Florida Doesn’t Need Carter’s Political Meddling

It was a classless thing to do, even by Jimmy Carter’s standards. As the people of Florida dug out from under the quadruple whammy of deadly hurricanes, President Gooberhead graced us with the latest in a string of unwanted, unneeded and unsolicited opinions. This time he wanted you to know that he is concerned about […]

Sep. 27, 2004: Good People Doing Good Things. Another Reason to be Proud of the U.S.

It never fails. Mention some of the wonderful qualities of the United States — something I don’t do enough by the way — and a bunch of “yes, but” whiners pop up like warts on a hog. Say that we are the richest, most powerful nation on earth and “yes, but” contrarians complain that is […]

Sep. 20, 2004: Some Cogent Comments About My Column on Georgia

Sometimes, I don’t understand the column-writing business. I can present a serious treatise about the impact of the International Monetary Fund on the price of cupcakes, or carefully analyze the three lucid thoughts our Ambassador to Outer Space Cynthia McKinney has had in her lifetime and I’ll get nary a peep from you. But let […]

Sep. 13, 2004: A One-on-One Conversation With Delta’s CEO

A ONE-ON-ONE CONVERSATION WITH DELTA’S CEO Knock! Knock! Knock! “Come in, young man.” “Mr. Grinstein, my name is Rigby and I think you wanted to see me?” “Yes, I did, Rigby. I believe you are in Shipping and Receiving. I wanted to ask you how the Delta employees reacted to my speech last week about […]

Sep. 6, 2004: Georgia Motorists Need To Slow Down

What will it take to get you to slow down on Georgia’s highways? Try this. Stop what you are doing for a second and look at someone you love. It could be your spouse, your significant other, your child, a parent or your best friend. Now, imagine that person has just learned that you have […]

Aug. 30, 2004: If This Isn’t Heaven, It Must Be The North Georgia Mountains

If heaven is prettier than the North Georgia mountains, I promise to change my sorry ways and to be a lot nicer in the future. Otherwise, I am going to ask God that if it is all the same with Him, would it be okay for me to just hang out somewhere in the vicinity […]

Aug. 23, 2004: An Endorsement From Gov. Sonny Perdue? Thanks, But No Thanks.

Thank you for being here today. I am Gov. Sonny Perdue, and I have an important announcement to make that I believe will dramatically change the political landscape of our state for years to come. I am pledging the awesome power of the governor’s office, as well as my own personal prestige, to see that […]

Aug. 9, 2004: The Battle Between Good and Evil is All in My Mind

“Attention readers: Given a spate of comments in this space recently that I found to be rude and insensitive, I wanted to inform you that I have ordered Richard to visit the exquisite little Georgia Sea Grill on St. Simons Island and consume massive quantities of corn-fried shrimp. It is my fervent hope that a […]

Aug. 16, 2004: More Unsolicited Advice for UGA President Michael Adams

Dear Mike: For several years, I have suggested that you would be well served to accept some sage advice from yours truly and that doing so might extricate you from the controversies that seem to swirl around you like fruit flies in a peach orchard. Because I received no response, I can only assume that […]

Aug. 2, 2004: Has John Kerry Already Written Off Georgia?

According to political pundits who get paid big bucks to know this stuff, the Kerry-Edwards team has pretty much written off the state of Georgia as they begin their campaign for the White House. One political writer put it this way, “There’s not a snowball’s chance that the Democrats are going to give much time […]

Jul. 26, 2004: What Time Is It? It’s Time For Answer Man

Okay, boys and girls, it is time once again for Answer Man, that much-requested feature in which yours truly answers questions from his adoring fans. Let’s go right to the mailbox. Dear Answer Man: How did a pea-headed birdbrain like you ever get to write a column? You have the intellectual capacity of a screwdriver. […]

Jul. 19, 2004: Protest Warriors Take on Left-Wing Loonies

Here is some news to light your fire. A group of young people calling themselves Protest Warriors are going to protest the protestors at the upcoming Republican convention in New York City. They claim the left-wing loonies have hogged center stage for too long and the Protest Warriors intend to beat them at their own […]

Jul. 12, 2004: A Letter To Sen. Miller: Give ‘Em Hell, Zell

Dear Senator Miller: As you wind down an illustrious political career that spans almost a half-century, I want you to know how much I appreciate all the great things you have done for Georgia. In this day of sound bites and polling data and political consultants, you tell it like it is. Good for you. […]

Jul. 5, 2004: Random Thoughts on Random Subjects

The primaries are upon us. Some interesting questions to ponder: Will Ambassador to Outer Space Cynthia McKinney alight on earth long enough to win the Democratic primary in the 4th Congressional district? Can former House Judiciary Chairman Tom Bordeaux, (D-Savannah), a staunch opponent of tort reform win reelection? Does anybody besides doctors, lawyers and insurance […]

Jun. 27, 2004: Explaining The State of Affairs at UGA To My Friends at Georgia Tech

Ever wondered how many Georgia Tech fans are walking the earth? I would estimate 900 million, because that is how many have asked me when was I going to write a column explaining to them the civil war at the University of Georgia. Call me cynical, but something tells me Tech folks are less interested […]

Jun. 20, 2004: A Salute To A Bunch of Live Democrats

A member of the Loyal Opposition — meaning those who don’t agree with anything I say, which includes about half of the inhabited earth — confided to a friend that, “the only Democrats Dick Yarbrough likes are dead Democrats.” Not true. There are a lot of live Democrats I like. Take Zell Miller, for example. […]

Jun. 13, 2004: Reviewing the Impact of the G-8 Summit Protests

Rap! Rap! Rap! “Ladies and gentleman and those of you somewhere in between, I call to order this meeting of the Committee for Rebellion, Unrest and Destruction, or CRUD, to review the impact of our highly anticipated protests during the recent G-8 Summit and to see if there is any room for improvement going forward. […]

Jun. 6, 2004: George W. Bush Needs to Follow Reagan’s Example

Ronald Reagan made me proud to be an American. He truly believed in the greatness of America, and he convinced the rest of us to feel the same way. God only knows where this country would be today had we not had the good sense to elect him president in 1980. President Jimmy Carter made […]

May 30, 2004: Attention Motorists: The Heat is On

You probably have already heard the news, but you need to hear it again: The HEAT is on. From now through September 12, more that 500 law enforcement agencies in the state are going to show zero — as in “none,” “nada,” ”zilch” — tolerance to the reckless drivers who have made Georgia’s highways so […]

May 23, 2004: Georgia On Your Mind? Try the Internet Encyclopedia

The rich just keep getting richer. As if Georgia wasn’t already the greatest place on God’s Green Earth, now we have our own online encyclopedia to prove it. The New Georgia Encyclopedia (www.georgiaencyclopedia.org) is the first state encyclopedia designed exclusively for the Internet. Not only does it contain all sorts of interesting information about our […]

May 16, 2004: At Last! Enjoy Some Good News For a Change

I don’t know about you, but I am tired of hearing bad news. I am weary of all the blathering on radio talk shows, smug comments by know-it-all television commentators and photographs of innocent Americans being beheaded by cowardly lowlifes in Iraq. Thus, this week I will focus only on good news in the hopes […]